colours too dull and spammed with imperfection
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
I'll try my best, not to run away from reality.
" I'd wonder where love go "
Yesterday, damn sad wtf omg. I fell (cos senior kinda pushed me) then one big hole injury on my left knee. Washing the blood off, then got one senior also playing the piano, playing sad song. I, crying from the injury, cried more listening to the song-.- Two teachers & 7+ seniors ask me if I'm okay, then I say okay, nothing much. LOL I dunwan be crazy tell them I thinking bout Didi right.
Then after training went to Jurong with Faz at around 6+. Then I went to the library, wait for my aunt. Fuck sia wait for like 4 hours. 10.40pm, then she come. Rushed home.
Morning wake up, fudge the bleeding still haven't stop and I can't get out of bed. So didn't go to school. Now at 2.31pm also the bleeding haven't stop. I losing too much blood, lol. I may faint. hahah.
Mum and dad went to the hospital this morning, cos mum had some contractions. Until now still haven't come back. Dad say maybe mum giving birth, zomg. Now I taking care of siblings at home.
Baby, I miss you. See you soon love.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
YOU WON'T BELIEVE IT YO.
TWENTY-THIRD JANUARY TWO ZERO ONE ONE.
Didikhaliesah is baaaack!!!!!!! HEHEHEHHEH ZOMFG WOOOOO. I'm thinking of squirrels. So happy. Been waiting all afternoon!! FINALLY, 3:11pm HE SAID IT. YAY I LOVE HIMMMM.
Dream come true or what.
NOW I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HIMMMMM.
k im screaming like a maniac. Bye sweetie. WOOOOO.
hehe I love you too (:
2301110311. omg the number so cool.
P/S I DONT CARE IF YOU SAY IMMA BITCH COS HE'S WAY BETTER K.
Friday, January 21, 2011
Love like Woe :)
Nan Chiau Primary School 6C '10
Crescent Girls' School 1C1 '11
" Can I get your lips to speak my name? "
Hehehe I woke up thinking about you :) The wonderful moments we had. Everything. Anything. Hahaha I have nothing to sayy. Currently having Love Like Woe - The Ready Set on replay. Thinking of youuu. When are you gonna say yes. What're you doing now. How're you. Ahhh, you're flooding yourself in my mind.
JUST SAY YES BABY, I MIGHT GO INSANE THINKING ABOUT YOU.
Yes dear, I love you :)
Labels: baby you and i are undeniable.
This is what I call love :)
R, it's more than 4 months we've been together. In fact, nearly it's 3 years. Studies show that, crushes only last for a maximum of 4 months. If it exceeds, you're in love. I'm afraid, I just can't forget you.
Watched 17 Again, and that's where it all began.
" You held me close, so close, that I could hear your heartbeat. It reminds me of when I was small, mum used to hold me. The exact same way you did. I cried, thinking of my painful past. You lifted my chin, dried my tears, hugged me and promised to never let go."
" We didn't talk much after the semester ended. That was when I thought, it's not working out well between us. And then the class jock came into the picture. With his sweet talks, I was hypnotised in a split second. "
" Now that I left you, and he left me, I completely regretted, and thought that it was the end without you. I never dared to forget the promises you made. It was just simply stupid of me, to trust him. I should have believed you. "
" Even though, we broke up 4 times, you still are willing to take care of me, understand my needs, ready to listen to any of my problems. I know the pain and heartbreak I caused. And now I wish to repay what I've done to you. I love you. "
If you'd just give me that one more chance, I promise I won't waste it again.
Didikhaliesah, est. 05October2009. ♥
Monday, January 17, 2011
What am I to you?
" Maybe just someone you met "
Yesterday, damn coooool. It's like back to primary school days, seriously.
Schooled, paid attention in Geography Class. Cos, there's an assignment coming up, and I can't afford to fail it. But I'm getting myself ready to fail History. I suck at it.
After school, went down to Compass Point, texting Danish from Pei Hwa. My senior^^. Chat chat chat, then reach CP, meet up with Clarissa aka Bun & Victoria. LOL, went to KFC, then saw Clara. Hugged her. Then saw Satees, Aaron & Nata. Hug Nata. Then went to Mac, nobody there except boys who stare. Then went up to Kopitiam, saw The Twins. Ate at Kopitiam, chatchatchat, text Leroy, then I got sick. Keep sneezing like what vacuum cleaner.
Then went library teach my sister. Help Vic do her Science. Then went off, meet uncle, go to Ikea. Right when I reach Ikea, Rusyaidi sms me. I was texting Faz & Clarissa. So total texting 3 people like mad, -.- So lol, stop sms-ing Faz & Clarissa. Sms R all the waaaay. Ohmy, both of us transferring to Pei Hwa. LOL. & he got into Badminton. Shocked me sia. Then he gotta go, he want to play badminton. So ya. Then sms Elinda. Then sms Syahmi. Then conference call with Elinda & Syahmi.
LOL, I forgot that I merge call already, I go stupidly say "Elinda, I sick ley, I cannot talk". Then she scream. Stupid me, :( So theeeen talk talk talk. Syah's voice damn deep o.o Blah blah blah. Hung up, sms only. Cos I really cannot talk, starting to sneeze like vacuum cleaner again.
Hope all 4 of us, get promoted to 2E2 next year :) See you soon in Pei Hwa :DD
Labels: just tell me the reason why
Sunday, January 16, 2011
In case you don't know.
" Since I'm your first "
I like to be treated differently from the rest of your normal friends. Like,
Labels: i don't want a painful ending.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
I can't give up just yet
" You just mean a lot to me "
Omg crying D: Idk why, suddenly I remembered my painful past. From the day mum left dad, mum didn't want me and left me with dad, and left the house with only 2 bags containing my stuff. I was 2 years old only then :'( Now I'm just like someone adopted in another family. An unwanted daughter. I miss dad & mum. Daddy's now sick. Mum's now doing I dunno what. How pathetic am I, I don't even know how to spell my mum's name. No wonder she didn't want me.
Why is the whole world crashing down on me? Why only now? Am I really that unwanted?
Is everything really my fault? Was it my fault dad & mum separated? I don't know. Now mum's texting me even more, calling me Princess and etc. I still don't understand why she left dad if she loves me. I feel like transferring school, cos being in Crescent Girls' reminds me of mum. And in Crescent's the place where I always put on my fake smile. I never smiled willingly since the day I became a Crescentian.
There'd been stories that Dad told me. When he was away for work last time, mum would torture me. She'd beat me hard, scold bad words, hit me with objects, treat me like a rag doll. I couldn't just believe that. She sounds like a nice woman. My mum was never bad.
I love you, mum & dad.
Friday, January 14, 2011
I just thought of something.
nvm, not important.
Anyway learnt River Flows In You by Yiruma. Only the beginning (Y) Still trying to learn the rest. Fudge la, no piano -.- Uh, NOTE. I'm going Compass Point every Wednesday & Friday. Or any other days when I finish school at 2pm. Awesome, last three days I went there, see many ex-NCPSians. They all like, "eh? Iffah ar?" Only Pei Shan said HELLOOO!! OMG SO NERD LAH YOU! Lol. & True, I turned into a mild nerd. Skirt longlong (okay lah not that long. Above knee), shirt tuck in, shoes CLEANCLEAN, appropriate bag.
I memorised mum's advice about being a true blue crescentian. I love her very much.
I love you too.
If I had you
" I would cry blood instead of crystal-clear tears "
YOU FORGOT! It's our first month D: I didn't text you about it cos I wanted to see if you remembered. But apparently you didn't. Sigh.
I wonder if you still remember my name.
Iffah khaliesah :(
Thursday, January 13, 2011
It's like, you don't seem to notice.
" It's nearly a month now "
bssh. Sekali kena slapped with homework. Just now morning, went Physics Lab for Science & the teacher damn funny. Sarcastic lah, but still funny. Get to try and play with the bunsen burner. FIRE IS LOVED BY ME. I just want to keep the fire in the jar and burn you.
Fuck I haven't done my science homework. Tomorrow have to discuss with the class. BYE.
Happy 1st Month in advance.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Once upon a fairytale.
" Cos not everything in 'reality' is real "
Aiyah, okay lah, school damn fun. Late for class again. Teacher also don't care. Then had 1/4 FITT Run. Holy frick it was tiring k. And some more it was hot. LOLOL the girls say I damn hot ;) HAHAHA.
After PE had Class Comm Voting. I didn't want to be Chairman. So didn't try. Tried out for Vice-Chair. YAY. Got it. hahahaha. Nice.
After school, went MRT station with Faz, then saw accident. Omg two cars & a motorcycle D: Ambulance came, then rain -.-
Late to meet Daddy at Compass Point. And and, LOLOLOL just now morning, met Faz at Redhill. Saw her, then waved at her. The boy in front of her, thought I wave at him. Then all the way until the exit he smile at me like some idiot. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. x')
Booo, you don't know how I feel.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
& You make me feel,
" Like I'm the only girl in the world . "
Lol. Heheheh nothing better to do. I shall spam some stuffffff.
I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it? I miss you, don't you get it?
I bet you don't D:
LOL SCHOOL ROCKS WHEN eh? Lol Honey Stars fell on my laptop. omg they're soo delicious. Anyway. lol i've nothing to say. Tomorrow's Wednesdayyy and my 1 week 1 day in Crescent. OHYES,
THE LAPTOP THAT WE CRESCENTIANS ARE SUPPOSED TO BUY IS A KILLER.
$2249 huh. My dad's salary lower than that sia. Zzz-.- Any kind souls out there to pay 100% for the TPC? :) Hehhehehe.
I love you very much and I miss you :)
My password rocks. \m/
Sunday, January 9, 2011
You are everything that I ever wanted.
" Since then I shall never assume anything in your absence "
I dunwanna do Comm Arts homework D: Lazy.
I immediately hated everything in sight.
I've nothing much to say.
I just miss you so much.
Saturday, January 8, 2011
I'd always imagine. When I cry, I always hope you're beside me. You'd turn to me, you'd hug me, and tell me everything's okay. I guess it'll never happen.
Sad, very sad. I wanted to call you, but I was afraid. I stare at my phone, waiting for your text. I type something I wanted to tell you, but I was scared you'd get angry. I feel like wanting to run to you, but I was afraid you'd push me, and tell me to go away. I'm scared of being neglected, rejected and ignored. I'm not used to living without you.
If I was brave enough, I'd tell you how I feel.
A new chapter in life.
" We will still be friends forever "
Well secondary school isn't that bad. I finished my first week. It was awesome. Hehhee. Let's talk about yesterday. It's gonna be damn long.
I went to school as usual, but Dad couldn't send me, so Uncle did. Took the train, wow, didn't feel like sleeping. So smsed Dayana (yes, in the morning at 6) and chatted until I reached school. Reached, I wanted to write a letter to Ms Tee but not enough time. So, just slacked with other girls. And then it was assembly. Went down, there was a talk about lab safety & School rules part 2. Listened, blahblahblah, then PE. Ms Tee brought us around the school.
Then briefing about something, then recess. Ate with Faz, Humaira' & some others. Skip this part until end of school.
Had lunch with Faz, Humaira', Ellysha (idk how spell her name :( ), Alya. Lol & got to know what CCA I got. CANOEING(: With Faz! hahaha so CCA Open House, went around for 2 hours, kena pulled by NCC & NPCC. Both is awesome k. haha. Then had Cheer training.
Went out of school & went to the mosque to pray. 5pm came back to school. Then rushed take bags and went to eat dinner. Well. Queue too long so only bought drink. Used Faz's iPhone go fb again hehehe.
Then it was the CAMPFIRE(: Fun lah, cheer & sing. Then RAIN T.T" So whole cohort rushed to the ISH, still got fire in the middle. Hahaha we danced and jumped like no tomorrow one, so damn fun. Hahaha yesyes, like clubbing. Lights off. Music 100% Volume. Omg really wished you're there.
Aunt keep calling me on phone, but I didn't pick up. So ended at around 9pm, then called her. She said "Urgent, rush to Redhill MRT Station now" So I rushed. Reached there, meet her, just to know that my dad admitted to the hospital. Cried all the way on the train, I don't care who look at me whatsoever. Mum called me, then told me not to cry. But I cried even more. Then I hung up on her. I was sobbing lah. Cannot tahan, I call Rusyaidi. LOL. Nothing better to do. 5 ringings, then hung up.
Reached hospital, still crying. LOL. Tried to eat, while texting mum. Then wait one hour, tried calling Rusyaidi again. Hahaha enough of him. Then daddy came out. GOSH, he looks damn tired & sick. Cried upon seeing him, :(
I persuaded him to stay in the hospital for one more night, but he refused. Again and again. He still refused. Sighh, so brought him home. So happy to know that Dad's okay.
Reached home, wash up, sleep. Didn't eat supper. Hehehe now I'm starving. I shall get myself Fried Rice.
P/S; The reason I didn't call you is because, I'm scared you'd just be "Lol." when I tell you I'm crying, this & that. It'll just hurt me further.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Besides canoeing, I love Fuzzy very much :D
Yayyyyy! I shall make a very important descision now. I hereby declare, to turn down the offer to enter SKSS. I love it in Crescent. Okay, even though I met some lesbians, thank God they're not from my class. hahaha. So as per normal I shall do it in point form.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Being a part of the Crescentian Family.
Tired ttm, so I shall just list them in point form. Gonna be quite long.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Sure, you got your gans, your gansteads, gangs whatsoever to back you up. I know, I got only a few. But that few, can make you cry blood. Cry all you want, bitch. I got my Dad and MUM too. I'm sure you don't have them. And I agree with him, you lost her because of retribution.
He told me to ignore you, but you're just some piece of unhealthy white shit waiting for a slap on the face. Ohyes, you said something about "Go out jiu go out lo, who the fuck cares? Why put it as a status? LOL OMG HAHAA, big joke." ? I did post that as my status, but for some people, not you, motherfucker. Suckass, oh my, even your ass sucks. I wonder if your bunch of armpit hair sucks too.
Sigh, Clarissa Siah Zu Ting, he told me not to have a war with you, he told me to ignore you, I guess I've not been doing what he tells me to do. Go ahead loser, say everything you want about me, I won't care. To any others, you're just a fucking loser. Low standard people, talks about other people, not realising who they are.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
I want you.
Just once, please fulfill my wish.
T.T" She thought I delete my blog. OMG SLOW. Posted status on fb, changed my link. Zzz, maybe just simply pajiao, or dumb, or jhasbjnvkrgriten. Stupid, I don't want war already. If continue like this, maybe your eye pop out crying.
Went back to Singapore today. Omg, 2 weddings. Must go gym alr ^^. Texted him, well, not all the way. lolidkwhy, :(
Fuck, seeing your name, makes my smile frown. I don't wish to elaborate, no mood. She sucks to the frigging core, she herself dog, like what he said. Dog = dog. Still want call me dog ==